A Series of Unfortunate Events

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jasoncover

First thanks to iFroggy himself, Patrick O’Keefe for sending me the graphic above to cheer me up. I didn’t even realize he put my face on “Alexander” until later.

My day today was quite the challenge.

First, because I’m an idiot and run my checking account to the red each month, due to a bit of an unplanned deduction I’ll end up paying FAR too many bank fees this week to Chase Bank. For a variety of reasons I really believe I’ve decided to dump my bank of 14 years. I’m sure they won’t miss me, they’ll just miss my money and fees.
Coming back from lunch I get a flat tire. I’ve needed to get tires for awhile, but just couldn’t swing the money to replace them all right now. See issue mentioned in #1 and remind myself I’m an idiot for knowing what Dave Ramsey says and not having an Emergency Fund.
Upon starting to get the spare out I realize that I’m missing the tool I need to crank the jack up and lift the car. I end up cranking it with a long bolt that was used to secure the spare to the trunk floor.
It starts to rain while I’m changing the tire and I get soaked in the process.
Upon bringing the jack down I’m confronted with the fact that my spare is also flat. I drive on the flat to the nearest gas station about 2 miles away.
Get out to air up the tire and it starts to rain harder
After all of that I finally head back to the office. On the drive back through a wooded section of road, I notice a bright blue light flashing through the trees. I’d never seen the light before so I stayed focused on it as I drove closer to the area. It turns out it’s circuit/connection on a utility pole that’s flaring up and arcing across a couple of wires. I stopped to look closer and noticed that this thing was really surging and it looked like it was going to blow. I call 911 and alert them, they send a fire truck out and take care of it I guess. They told me I could leave, so I left.
As I was waiting on the fire-truck I tried to get out of the way of a car driving down the road and getting around my car and I step into a muddy puddle with my new pair of Nikes.
My wife called and reminded me that I was supposed to pick-up the kids for her today so she could be with friends of ours that were having a medical procedure done. No way I could make it at that point.
On the way to get new tires (more expense see #1) a guy isn’t paying attention at a stoplight and doesn’t see the car in front of him stop. He swerves to miss that car and about takes me out in the process.